Here’s food for thought! A gleaming light catches your eye. You turn around and are fixated by this one girl. Your head processes this information, and your mind is blown away by the fact that she looked in your direction. For days on end, you wonder if you are up to the challenge to say, “Hi my name is Bob”.

Instead, you choose to have your chin down and leave in total embarrassment. You invent excuses not to talk to her: “She may have a man”, “Maybe she was looking at someone behind me”, “She looks kinda funny.” Yet deep down you can’t stop thinking about her and you feel all giddy inside.

Yes, what a one-sided love story. But is there ever going to be a happily ever after? I know it sounds like a Bollywood scene, but this feeling is familiar to many of us. These thoughts are so powerful that it can change your mood instantly from a state of serene happiness to one of intense melancholy. It is a feeling that you cannot erase because it still leaves you feeling like you are walking on air. This girl could be absolutely anyone, whether the girl on the bus, the generous coffee shop cashier, the smiling financial advisor or even the amazing Bhangra dancer on the dance floor.

Many of us have these feelings of insecurity that become amplified when we think of “what ifs”. We are so afraid of rejection that we often lose out on the opportunity to meet someone new.  So often, we can be our own worst enemies. Despite knowing what we really want, we begin to second-guess ourselves and back out at the last minute. This insecurity can make us feel like someone may be out of our league.

But one should not assess someone based on looks but on the words that come out of their mouth. The media tells us that if we have big arms or the most expensive rides or if we party like a rock star, we are consider the “it” thing.  In all honesty, it just leads to infidelity, debt and addictions.

I am not saying that everyone is like that if they follow this path. Keep in mind not to forget who you are as a person when approaching someone and how you treat the next person. There is a quote that my friend told me once, “A man who treats his girl like a Princess is proof he was raised by a Queen”.

Let’s get back to the moment when you need to approach that special someone. You need to realize that women love a man who is confident and who is at ease with the world. A feeble man who stutters and mutters absolute nonsense is an absolute turn off.

Do not be afraid to introduce yourself. Maybe she’ll find you cute or admire the fact that you took notice of her. You never know until you try. And if she throws you a hardball like “I have a man” or “I’m not interested”, you need to understand that it’s not the end of the world. Maybe there is someone better for you. But without taking that first step you’ll never know.  

Meeting a woman is like the interview phase and you need to prove to her why not “you”. If you prove to her that you aren’t just anyone and maybe over the years you might be the one.

All in all, I know this is no easy task and that sometimes it’s easier to go with what’s certain rather than the unknown. But you can take the hard road, swallow your pride and you might simply get something amazing out of it. You just need to forget all the worries, questions and insecurities. You might just get an experience, a friend or that someone special.

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